Insufficient Payment

First of all, let me apologize for missing my last two posts. I missed Friday because shit happened that made it vitally important I drink several snake bites then come home and lie on the couch with a box of tissues watching Season 2 of Chuck (is anyone else distracted by Chuck’s college girlfriend being the lesbian supervillain from DEBS? Is anyone else pondering the amazing possibilities of a Chuck/DEBS crossover? Has anyone else actually seen DEBS?) Sundays post fell victim to the hard drive in my laptop dying on the day my dissertation proposal was due.

Which brings me to the real point of this post. My wonderful co-blogger Cammy took quite a bit of time out of her weekend and work week to give me advice, research hard drives, assure me that the world was not over… Cammy is my go-to tech support. I’d like to say that I haven’t taken advantage of this in the past. And I’d like to say that I won’t take advantage of it in the future. But while I’m comfortable with lying, Cammy is not. So yeah… I’m a bit of a douche in that department.

So really this post is a giant thank you to all of my friends with useful skills who get taken advantage of. The computer literati, the people with trucks, the amateur mechanics. In addition to holding real jobs they tend to wind up working for us for nothing except gratitude. I mean, I would love to repay in kind, but the bottom line is that while I like to think I’m not totally devoid of skills, I am lacking in skills that would ever be of use to my friends. I have yet to get the call saying, “Hey, I need someone to walk across a loosely tied rope… do you mind?” Chances are minimal of any of my friends ever asking me, “Hey, do you happen to know what tale type this story falls under?” (Okay, that actually sort of did happen once. But only once.) I always hope that my editing skills will be of use to someone, but for better or for worse, all my sciency computery friends are disgustingly well-rounded people who can edit their own cover letters. I pay local friends in homemade ice cream or sorbet, but this is somewhat difficult when the friend in question is two states away.

So I know it’s insufficient payment, but to all those friends who have helped me out of all those jams I would like to say a giant thank you. Us useless folk do notice all you do for us, even if it doesn’t always feel that way.

Technical difficulties

Apologies for the lack of a Friday post.  Bigger apologies if you couldn’t reach the site.  I spent about 4 hours on Friday evening trying to get connected to the site so I could post my entry, but alas, the Internet Overlords (or at least the web hosting overlords) were against me (and if they were against you between the hours of 8 and midnight, please leave a comment–I’m still trying to narrow down the reasons for the issue).  So, I’m going to try to post this back-dated (don’t want to take the top spot from Kristy).

Coincidentally, I was going to blog about another technical difficulty which tried to ruin my Friday:  my car wouldn’t (and still won’t) start.  She drove just fine Monday, and cranked with no issue Tuesday (before I opted to drive my Mom’s car instead since it hasn’t been out of the garage in a while).

I hate not being able to fix things myself, unfortunately the time it would take me to work on the car and figure out the problem, well, I just don’t have it.  I can narrow down all the obvious stuff (the battery is fine as are the connections to the battery, she’s not leaking any fluids, nothing looks obviously disconnected under the hood and her fuses appear to be okay).  She attempts to turn over when I crank it, but just never does.  There are some other things I could work on checking (spark plugs and connectors, the starter itself…), but again it goes back to time and lack of familiarity–while my conceptual knowledge of the operation of my car is enough to keep me from feeling totally embarrassed, the hands-on part makes me feel utterly ridiculous.  I mean, I know the role of the starter and basically how it operates, but I’ll be damned if I could actually pop the hood of a car and point to it with an certainty.

So, since I have two other vehicles that need driving, I’m very lucky.  I’ll be waiting until my next Friday off work to call up the tow service connected to my repair shop of choice.  And when it turns out to be some easy-peasy fix, I’ll try to assuage my feelings of inadequacy and stupidity by reminding myself that the cost will be worth it for the time and frustration I save.

Tired of Waiting on the Future

Top 5 Things We Should Have Since It’s The Future:

5) Food pellets.  Because, while I know some of you are totally into your food, I’m not always that way.  If I had a totally filling yet completely neutral method of getting my nutrients, I’d probably be all in for that time saver.

4)  The instant sober, no hangover pill:  This would be a drug company ad I could go in for.  I just hope it doesn’t come with the nausea, indigestion, stomach upset, headache–after all, that’s what we’re aiming to avoid.

3)  Flying cars.  Just.  Because.

2) The Transporter beam.  Now, I know that would seem to make the whole flying car thing moot, but really, flying cars are just fun so can that argument.  For long-haul, quick delivery travel, we want transporters.  Think about how much less we’d all hate the TSA if they queued us up to walk into a little scanny thing only instead of getting virtually strip-searched, we were zipped off to Grandma’s in less than 2 seconds instead of going off to sit in crappy waiting room chairs and being forced to purchase food items at a criminal mark-up.

1)  The automatic sock handler.  I HATE dealing with socks in the laundry.  I hate trying to find them all to put them into the washer.  I hate trying to match them up, I hate actually putting them together.  Loathe it.  Despise it.  Always have.  It’s tedious, and you have the perpetual odd-sock issue.  Since my youth I have dreamed of a machine that would collect, wash, match and fold all the socks at the touch of a button.  WHERE IS THIS I ASK YOU?!?!?  Did we really need 3 different gaming system platforms?  I think at least ONE of those companies could have put a little effort into making my life easier.  I can make a little avatar of myself jump all over a damned TV screen, but in order to do it, I have to find time to get all the sock laundry done.

The future is here.  I’m tired of waiting.  Give me my technology, damnit!

Time Vampire: Technology Set Up

My DVD player has been dying a slow death since last year.  I had decided that when I replaced my player I would go with a Blu Ray.  Well, at long last, just before Thanksgiving, I found that my player had breathed its last.

The drawn-out demise of my player left me lots of time to scope out what I wanted in its eventual replacement.  Lucky for me–it made it easy when a Cyber-Monday special ran a particular model at about half off.  Huzzah!  Merry early Christmas to ME!

And lo, it arrived yesterday.  Pull it out of the box, plug it in…..I have no fear of electronics.  This is easy.

Until I have to put in the network key.

Now, my wireless network key is…..heinous.  By choice.  A little paranoia goes a long way.  Until you have to input 26 randomly generated characters using a remote control that takes entry like a telephone keypad.

It took 3 and a half hours.

I could have let it go.  I could easily have grabbed the unused network switch from upstairs and a few feet of network cable and hard wired the thing.  But no.  When it comes to tech set up, I hate, hate, HATE defeat.  This damn Blu Ray was set for wireless and by damnit I was going to use it!


So maybe the time vampire with technology?  It’s really my pride.

Top 5 Reasons I Am Scared of/Hate Facebook

5)  I have never felt like I completely understood all the security settings.  They keep jacking around with the toggles and switches and when the stupid games and shit first started I was never sure what I was saying okay to.  Obviously, the fact that I tweet, and write posts like this says I’m not totally scared of having a web presence, but I am a little particular about how I control it–and until I’m 100% confident in the facebook system, I will remain scared of it.

4) It’s…busy.  There’s just so much STUFF going on when you log in.  Friend requests, friend suggestions, messages, wall posts, updates, Farm shit….where do you even start?!?!?  I log in, get overwhelmed, and wind up logging out just as  fast as I can.

3) People throw shit and poke me.  I’ve been beaned by gnomes, poked until I’m black and blue and for some reason people keep “giving” me virtual plants and animals.  WTF?  Nothing says, “we’re buddies” like assault with virtual weapons.

2) Every friggin person I love and loathe is there.  Relatives I haven’t laid eyes on since I was in kindergarten.  Classmates from my old high schools.  People from work.  Some of them it’s interesting to hear from, some of them I don’t care, and some of them I never wanted to think of again and would prefer to deny knowing.  And for a lot of them, I know they don’t want to reconnect–they want be creepy busy bodies who satisfy their voyeuristic tendencies by looking up people they used to know.

1) The number one thing I hate?  It’s expected.  There are people I literally cannot get a hold of any way BUT facebook.  This is a major piss off.  I’m stuck having to log into this crappy-ass system because their asses are too lazy to communicate via anything outside of facebook.  Would it kill your ass to write a fucking e-mail once in a while?