A Culinary Travesty

I had my first strawberry shortcake of the season this evening. It was brought to my house by a friend. In this incarnation “strawberry shortcake” meant fresh sliced strawberries served over those pre-made dessert cups with whipped topping. Synthetic and processed, but good if not outstanding.

 

Growing up we had strawberry shortcake at least once or twice per summer. My mom would cut up a bunch of strawberries and put them in the refrigerator with a little sugar so they would release their juice. Then she would make a pound cake and we would eat the strawberries on that with some whipped topping. (Mom wouldn’t use the real stuff because she hates freedom). Occasionally if she was feeling lazy and/or there was a sale we would use a store bought angel food cake. Actually for several years I hated soggy cake to the point I would have just a bowl of strawberries with whipped topping.

 

But when I moved to the mid-Atlantic I found out some people do something very wrong with their strawberry shortcake—they make it with a biscuit. Seriously? Biscuits are a side. They also make a tasty breakfast. They are not a dessert. Why would you put your strawberries and cream on a biscuit?

 

And they don’t just do this out of ignorance either. I tried to introduce some of the biscuit crowd to the wonders of pound cake, only to have them insist it was better with a biscuit. Is this some kind of Protestant guilt thing where they can’t stand the indulgence of a full dessert? Is it just because they know they make biscuits better than Yankees and have to show them off?

Whatever it is, it needs to stop. I hearby will make it my business: If I do nothing else with my life, I will make someone who would have otherwise eaten just a soggy biscuit to eat a good grilled cheese.

3 Responses to “A Culinary Travesty”

  1. Teapot says:

    No, no, no! The biscuits *are* shortcakes! They’re sweeter than true biscuits but less sweet than pound cake — to me, pound cake + sweetened strawberries is just cloying. And shortcakes are closer to scones than biscuits, anyway. If you had warm-from-the-oven nutmeg-scented shortcakes topped with tons of macerated fresh strawberries and real, home-whipped cream, I bet I could convert you.

    • Kristy says:

      I have absolute faith that if prepared by you, it would at the very least be better than what I’ve had. I have definitely seen Virginians use biscuits straight from a can for this.

  2. Bridget says:

    I will eat strawberry shortcake, whatever version it appears in. I think I just really like strawberries…

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